How is she 1 already!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Where the hell has a year gone??? Seriously someone tell me! One minute I am kangeroo caring for my teeny tiny Diva,tube feeding, watching the monitors like my life depended on it, having arguements with Consultants and the next minute I am trying to stop her from using the TV stand as a climbing frame!! A year! So much has happened but all to quick, I don't feel like I have had her at home for 5 minutes. I feel sad that my preemie Diva will soon be a toddling diva but on the other hand I am so proud of how well she has done. I am very confused at the moment :-(

Love Dee and Diva

My preemie diva from scan to 15 weeks old!

And then it started to go wrong.........

Febuary 17th 2011 was meant to be one of the most exciting days of my life. It was my 20 week scan ( well i was about 22 weeks they scanned me late!) and Mr H and I, plus my 3 boys all went to the hospital to see the baby and find out if the boys were going to have a baby brother or a little sister!. The scan started off so well, it was the same sonographer as my 12 week scan and she remembered me! SO she zoomed in straight to the heart and showed me! After about 15 minutes of measuring and all that stuff they do she turned round and said ' so are we wanting to know what we are having?' I had it in my head we were having another boy which was the plan anyway! I wanted my youngest son to have a little brother that he could look after as my eldest 2 are extremely close and tend to leave him out! So I said its ok I know we are having a boy. Nice lady looked at me, laughed and said ' although we cant say 100% as sometimes we do get it wrong, you need to start buying pink!!' I was gobsmacked as was Mr H and the 3 boys! Then her face turned a bit serious. ' Mrs Humphrey you have a grade 4 placenta praevia' I had no idea what this meant! She explained that the placenta was completely covering my cervix so I would probably have to have a c section. I explained I was having one anyway as I had 2 previous c sections. So we left the scan feeling excited about having a girl and I didnt think much of what she said about the Placenta Praevia.

This is where it all started to go wrong................ to be continued as I am already getting upset just thinking about what happens next.

Love Dee and Diva x

This is my 20 week scan where the troubles with my pregnancy started to come to light. To be continued...............................................................

Lets start at the beginning then!!!!

so here goes! Amelia-Jayne's adventures started really back in May 2010 when I lost her little brother or sister. All was going well in the pregnancy went to my 12 week scan only to be told that the baby had died about a week before. Clearly me and Mr H ( my hubby) were devastated to be told this. After waiting nearly 2 weeks, for the hospital to decide whether to let me naturally miscarry or surgically remove the failed pregnancy, I hemorrhaged at home in front of my 3 other children and was rushed to hospital via Ambulance. The hospital then decided that surgically removing the pregnancy was the best option!

Mr H and I discussed whether getting pregnant again would be a good idea as we didn't want to have the heartache of loosing another baby so we put it to the back of our minds and continued with normal daily life.

Well you can imagine our surprise come September when mother nature failed to arrive!! I did 6, yes 6, pregnancy tests in one go ( they were the dip in the pot of pee ones) and one by one they all popped up positive! Excitement welled up inside of me then just as quick as it came vanished as I thought back to my earlier miscarriage. I told Mr H straightaway and bless him he just wasn't feeling the excitement, he was just filled with dread that I was going to put myself and him through another heartache. About a week after finding out I was pregnant came the most horrendous morning sickness ( although I question the name as it came any time of the sodding day including the school run!! Oh yes I threw up in the playground!) Now people say a healthy sign of pregnancy is good old morning sickness so I took that as a good sign! We waited with baited breath for our 12 week scan and the day we had been dreading but looking forward to arrived. I walked in, burst in to tears, whilst Mr H explained to the sonographer why I was so emotional! She was lovely though and as soon as she found Miss AJ she whipped the screen round and showed me her pounding little heart. Now Mr H was excited! We had got to 12 weeks! Hurrah!

And so the adventure begins.........

So I decided to start my own blog, recording my adventures with my premature daughter Miss Amelia-Jayne!

Her first birthday is looming around the corner and all of a sudden I feel like I am reliving the whole nicu experience! Not just when I go to sleep, but I start day dreaming about it in the middle of the day or when I am walking around the local supermarket.

Many people have said to me I should start writing everything down as it can be a good source of therapy. I started a support group on Facebook called I <3 my preemie just after AJ came home as I was looking for other parents who had been in my situation. A lot of my wonderful and very brave members have given there story about the birth of their preemies, but I, as of yet, have not! I did guest feature on a blog owned by one of my preemie gang members though so I suppose thats a great start!

So in my own words I will begin to start the adventures of a preemie diva over the next couple of days and will try not to bore everyone!

Love Dee and The Diva!